“ Your father, outraged at your flouting of his generation’s values, bursts into your room. Bellowing nonsense, the familiar scent of cheap whiskey on his breath, he snaps your board in half. You briefly consider purchasing a new one, but the sting of your father’s belt leads you to abandon the idea. You drop skating altogether and devote yourself to your studies, eventually graduating magna cum laude. Your father dies of alcohol poisoning a week later, and, on the plane back from the funeral, you meet Sarah. The two of you get married, settle down in a nearby suburb, and produce three children. You’re not sure how you’re going to make ends meet with your office job: the hours are long and the pay is low, but you feel confident that hard work will see you through. On your way out of the team-building seminar, however, you trip on an exposed stone and totally beef it all over the pavement. Combo breaker!